Top ten motorway services

If, like MT, you’ve spent a deeply unhealthy vacuum of time on the motorways of the UK – avoiding tricky situations in life, or simply just losing your religion – then chances are you’ve encountered places officially marked out as ‘rest areas’.

Densely and perpetually re-populated communities that serve to alter your perspective on life in but the blink of a lazy eye. Places that also serve food. Not food as you know it though, and indeed not served under the pretense of rapidity suggested on the accompanying advertising.

These places also offer banking facilities, mini-marts, baby-changing areas and our personal favourite zone – the arcades. Complete with 1976 stand-alone gaming machines. Not ‘retro’ you understand. Simply never updated since 1976.

We welcome you to the doors of the very British institution that is the Motorway Services.

You see, there was a time when travellers made and packed egg and cress sandwiches and poured some liquid that passed as tea into a thermos flask, before heading off on a long road journey and locating a suitably scenic place in which to sample their culinary delights. Although this was before people could be pixellated, and still lived their lives in low definition.

Yet historically, even the spectre of becoming trapped in a space/space continuum – a seeming vortex of degradement - did nothing to dampen the spirits of many motorway users who gave into the senseless allure of the motorway service area from its inception in 1959, along with the M1 at Watford Gap. Which possibly remains as UK’s most famous service area to this day.

MT’s obsession with what lay behind the architecturally-wanting sight of a traditional motorway service area stems from a childhood whereby consternation ensued if we caved into peer pressure and sank our teeth into a Big Mac and fries or dared ask for designer trainers come Christmas. So requesting that we divert to the sights, sounds and smells of the motorway service area was a shout too loud.

Besides which, we were constantly reminded whilst driving on past the South Mimms service area: “Don’t even think about it. The food’s far too expensive, the toilets are unclean and that you might get kidnapped by unsavoury types.” Too late. We already had, and no amount of ghost stories was going to deflate our growing curiosity.

The thing is, the family elders weren’t wrong.

A constant source of derision and ridicule over the years, with tales of food poisoning, toilets that spawn their own sustainable bacteria-derived life form and that murky, brown substance they call coffee served by moribund staff that were neither friendly, helpful or alive, motorway services needed to employ Max Clifford with a vengeance if they were to turn things around.

Services today

Even today, in 2008, there’s some folk who only ever darken the doors of motorway services so as to alleviate the call of nature in a safe environ where the risk of frostbite to certain extremities is eradicated.

What MT is attempting to do is formulate a damn-near league table of roadside eateries - the like of which many will have never witnessed, let alone partaken in. Where points will be duly awarded for such protracted highway decency and rudimentary utilities such as parking, visual impression, hygiene, prices, choice, environmental protection and revolving leaflet stand functionality. Or revolve-ability.

Until we realised that someone had got there first. Unofficially. As there currently is no conclusive table that lists blow-for-blow which chain owned or independent-snaffled roadside treat ranks highest and lowest, based on hard-nosed fact. And not just the gripes of visitors who can be bothered to leave their thoroughly disgruntled views.

At the minute, only www.motorwaysservices.info – who kindly donated the images found at the bottom of the page as well as being on hand with a few facts and figures - provides any semblance of a ratings scheme to allow would-be journeymen and women some prior knowledge as to what they may be letting themselves in for. And a none too shabby job they do too.

Its very own unique – and hugely symbolic -  ‘Burger ratings’ section has been accumulated on the back of motorway services posting their individual thoughts and feelings on what they encountered at most of the major service areas the length and breadth of the UK. The good, the bad and the downright hideous, as no punches are pulled.

Top ten motorway service stations

Tebay Services M6 Northbound - 'The staff seem to care'

Situated between Junctions 38 and 39 on the M6 northbound, the independently-owned Westmorland franchise is as close to motorway service utopia as is physically and humanly possible.

And therefore assumes the mantle of Britain’s numero uno in terms of just about everything. You like a cracking view, peppered with all manner of flora and fauna, water features – a lake and ducks? Consider it done.

You crave fresh, local farm-derived produce as opposed to peddlers of calorific junk food? You’ve got it. You want a picnic table or three to eat it at? Not a problem. Friendly faces and exceptional customer service? It’s a given. You want to fill your car up with Total fuel? Your day just couldn’t get any better.

Also: Free parking, three-star hotel, cash machines, retail shop, caravan park

What folk say:"Absolutely excellent - it just shows what can be done when the multinationals are kept out and local people run the services.”

"Top shelf reading of a very high standard.”

Strensham Services M5 – 'Always spot on for customer service'

Located betwixt Junctions 7 and 8, the Road Chef-operated venture is a worthy runner-up in the latest poll.

Costa Coffee, PizzaHut Express, Wimpy and McDonalds will all willingly accept their part in clogging up the travelers arteries, whilst WH Smith, Cotton Traders and Fonebitz will do level bests to fleece the passing, desperate motorist.

Marred only by the twin factoids that access to facilities is only available from the one direction and that’s there’s no absolutely chance of pedestrians mooching between the split sites due to a dock-off big motorway dividing them. Texaco and BP provide the fuel.

Also: Children’s play area, picnic area, cash machines, Premier Travel Inn, retail shop

What folk say:"Perfectly fine visit but kicked my sat nav out of car when getting in with my granddaughter a week Friday March 23rd. I cannot find a link that will enable me to report this or get advice. Please help. It’s a long shot but someone may have handed it in. We were on the north side it is a Nav Man. Thank you”

Stafford Services M6 Southbound -'Good parking and showers'

Pinpointed between Junctions 14 and 15, this Roadchef-owned and ran outlet receives the collective thumbs up from motorists.

Staff noted for cheery demeanour in bad weather.

Also: Retail shop

What folk say:"I only used the shop, but the gentleman who served me was very polite and courteous. The weather was very windy and as I left the shop he wished me a safe journey in the poor weather - what a great ambassador for RoadChef!”

Bradford West Services M62North/Southbound – 'Toilets are fantastic and very modern'

Clinching the number four spot with little if any competitions, the Bradford West Services is conveniently located between Junction 25 and 26.

Both sites are linked by a pedestrian footbridge and boast their own separate facilities to tempt the weary driver. If they’re that knackered they’d consider KFC and Burger King nutritious.

Ably served by Shell petroleum. On the downside, you must pay for parking after a 2 hour stop. However should you drive a car and cross the 2 hour threshold, you get a £2 meal voucher along with your £8 charge.

Also: Picnic area, children’s playground, Gamezone, BT Openzone, cash machines, Premier Inn, retail shop.

What folk say:"I thought this place was called Heartshead Moor Services”

Gordano Services M5 – 'It was so clean there and the staff were really helpful.'

Found at Junction 19 and ran by Welcome Break, Gordano Services offers everything a driver could want. If they’re fond of their food, that’ll be Burger King, KFC and Eat In.

There’s a retail shop for everything else, including snacks, magazines and nick-knacks. Fuel is sponsored by Shell.

Also: Cash machines, free parking (for 2 hours), Gamezone, BT Openzone, Days Inn motel.

What folk say:"Stopped off on the way to London from Exmouth. Very friendly staff and an excellent selection of hot and cold food. Toilets were very clean and I was particularly impressed with the wide selection of train literature.”

Leigh Delamere Services M4 – 'No question about it, but the best services on the M4!'

Situated between Junction 17 and 18 and operated by Moto, Leigh Delamere Services has its own bespoke restaurant, a café, Burger King and M&S Simply Food, so there’s no shortage of choice on an unscheduled pit-stop.

In fact, this service area thinks of everything as along with a WHSmith it has a barber shop for that ‘something for the weekend sir’ that we can't mention. Fuel comes courtesy of Esso.

Also: Picnic area, children’s play area, cash machines, Travelodge and free parking for up to 2 hours.

What folk say:"Help received at this service station when my husband had serious nose bleed were exceptional.”

Cherwell Valley Services M40 – 'Certainly the best services I have visited'

Located at Junction 10 and under the wing of Moto, Cherwell Valley is the current holder of the ‘Loo of the year’ awards for motorway services.

Toilets aside, and Costa Coffee, Burger King, Ritazza and Fresh Express are all in evidence, as is M&S Simply Food, Thornton’s, Ladbrokes and WHSmith, to cover every eventuality en route to your destination. Esso provide the fuel on your exit.

Also: Picnic area, children’s playground, cash machines, free parking for up to 2 hours and a Travelodge.

What folk say:"For dog owners on the motorway, (and kids who might need to run off some steam) its worth walking through the alley between the hotel and main service area (by the telephone boxes) Over a footbridge and this leads onto a vast grassed public open space.”

Tebay Services M6 Southbound – 'Absolutely excellent in every respect'

Situated in the lea of Junctions 38 and 39 and with privately-owned Westmorland running the whole shebang (like on the Northbound site) it’s another top-notch motorway services that cater for just about every motorists taste.

The views are spectacular again, and the setting idyllic, and if you don’t want to feather ‘the Man’s’ nest, then this is the place to pitch up. BP does the honours with the fuel supply.

Also: Cash machines, amusements, independently-run shop and restaurant.

What folk say:"We live near it, and do sometimes go there for a day out! Great free children's indoor play area (only one for miles!), fair local food, and good value, plus great views.”

Blackburn with Darwin Services M65 – 'More like a mini shopping centre'

Spotted at Junction 4 and from A666, it’s owned by Extra MSA and fields a McDonalds, Little Chef and an LP4 Francais restaurant on the single site. It sells Shell petroleum at its pumps.

Also: Free parking, cash machines at filling station, Somerfield essentials and a Travelodge in the grounds.

What folk say:"This is a great place to have an Alan Partridge moment and eat a Sunday McDonalds on the car park, maybe shoot some baddies in the mini arcade and then buy an inflatable neck cushion from the Safeway. There’s also a radio station there. Great.”

Winchester Services M3 – 'Modern and up to scratch!'

Caught between a Junction J8 and J9 and run by Roadchef, this carriageway-spanning twin site affair has separate facilities for each area and is linked by a pedestrian bridge.

All of which makes for better reading than was not so many years ago as our motorway services languished in a state of flux somewhere between irreversible decay and stubborn nostalgia.

Where a standard meal would cost twice as the equivalent dish in either Italy or Germany’s motorway service areas, now prices are found to be more competitive, and contemporary fixtures and fittings such as Marks and Spencer’s mini food halls have risen in the place of – or at least side by side with – greasy spoons, and are now almost omnipresent on a distant, link-bridged horizon on numerous UK motorways.

It certainly now sounds like there's mile and miles of sunshine and smiles ahead.

What folk say: "Stopped here on the way back to Maidenhead from Southampton and have to agree with the Costa Coffee being very good. The tea I had stayed hot for ages! I was impressed with the overall cleanliness of the services too.”

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